The Perfect Gift

Top Ten Gifts Every Wife Wants

This year give your wife the gift she really wants.

1. Appreciation. Recognize what she does. Thank her for her hard work. Express gratitude for the little tasks she takes care of that you may usually take for granted. Write a note. Send a text. Or say thank you as soon as you walk in the door.
2. Compliments. Tell her she is beautiful. Compliment the dress that she is wearing or the color of her shirt. Give her positive feedback about her work. Tell her that she is an amazing mother. Tell her that she’s smart. Tell her that she’s talented. She needs to hear it especially from you.
3. Empathy. Commiserate with her when she’s had a hard day. Listen to her. Say things like: It sounds like you had a really rough meeting. I can’t believe you stood in line for that long, you must have been so frustrated. You must be so tired from being up all night with the baby; it must have been really challenging managing everything at work today.
4. Kindness. Be available to help. Fill up her car with gas. Fix her computer or offer to help her with a problem at work. Hold the baby. Do homework with the kids. Ask your wife if she needs anything. Give her a break. Apologize when you hurt her feelings. Be kind.
5. Friendship. Be her friend. Go on dates together or spend focused time with each other. Do fun things together. Plan adventurous trips even if they will be short. Share your struggles. Encourage each other. Be happy for each other’s accomplishments.
6. Affection. Tell her that you love her. Buy her flowers. Express how happy you are to be married to her. Tell her that she completes you.
7. Respect. Research shows that the first thing to go in a marriage is politeness. We get too comfortable around those closest to us, and we forget to show them basic respect. Call her or message her when you’re running late. Even if it’s just five or ten minutes later than the time that she was expecting you. Hold open doors for her. Greet her. Smile at her. Look at her when you are speaking.
8. Acceptance. Accept her weaknesses. Understand that she often sees things differently from you, remembers things differently from you, and handles things differently from you. Praise her strengths. Reassure her that you are always there for her.
9. Authenticity. Be real with her. Share with her important experiences in your life. Tell her about what is happening at work. Express when you are worried, angry or sad. Don’t try to hide or deny your feelings.
10. Laughter. Maintain your sense of humor especially in times of stress. Share inside jokes. See the lighter side of life. Eliminate mockery and sarcasm. Laugh with each other but not at each other.

Top Ten Gifts For Husbands

Skip the new tie.  Give your husband the gift he really wants.

1. Respect. A husband wants to feel like his wife respects him and what he does. He wants her to honor him through her actions and words. Speak highly of him to others. Allow him to speak without interruption. Show interest in his work and ideas.
2. Intimacy. In contrast to women who rely more on words as a means of connection, husbands depend more on physical affection in order to both express and receive love. When they are rejected physically, they automatically feel rejected emotionally. They need intimacy not only as a foundation to sustain the relationship, but they also rely on this affection as a barometer for the strength of their spouses' attraction to them.
3. Space. Men do not want to be nagged or criticized. They want to be treated like a partner, not like a child who needs constant reminders to get things done. This often requires wives to give the men in their lives space, both physically and emotionally. Let him complete tasks at his own pace and with his own system. Learn to step back and let him figure things out.
4. Focus. Husbands want to feel like they are an important priority in their spouses' lives. They feel left out and hurt when they sense that their needs come after the kids, their friends, her work etc. This doesn't mean that husbands necessarily need a lot of our time; they just need to feel like we are focused on them when we are with them. Listen. Make eye contact. Turn off the volume on the phone. Make him feel like he is important in your life.
5. Nurturing. Try to care for your husband with nurturing actions. Make a favorite dinner. Pick out an item you know he needs. Send him a sweet message just because you are thinking of him. Make him a warm cup of coffee. Send a plate of homemade cookies for a class he attends. Make him feel cared for and treasured.
6. Direct communication. Men have a hard time figuring out what their wives are feeling or thinking. They don't like to play guessing games or to be blamed for not knowing what their wives really want. Tell him what you are feeling directly. Let him know what you want as specifically as you can describe it. Ask for help when you need it. Communicate directly and clearly.
7. Fun. Play a sport together. Discover different places and activities as a couple. Be willing to join him in a new hobby. Enjoy being together without the pressure of financial or child centered conversation.
8. Encouragement. Give him positive feedback when he accomplishes something important at work. Encourage him when he takes a step toward learning or growing in a new way. Be his cheerleader, but not his coach or investigator. Be a source of ongoing support in his life.
9. Optimism. Do the best you can to see the life that you share together with a positive perspective. See hope when things are rough. See the opportunity to get up when you both experience failure. Look for the first light of dawn when, together you are surrounded by darkness. See the cup not only as half full but full of something good. Make sure, on a daily basis, that your expressions of gratitude outnumber your complaints.
10. Satisfaction. Husbands want their wives to be happy. They want them to be content with them, with their homes, with themselves. They yearn for their wives' genuine smiles, for the peaceful feeling at the end of the day that their hard work has been "good enough.” Work on that sense of peace, both internally and externally. Make your husband feel like he is exactly what you need.

Top Ten Gifts for Children

The greatest gift we can give our children is to recognize their unique light they can bring to the world.

1. Attention. Listen when they speak. Focus on what interests them. Ask specific questions about their thoughts and try to see the world through their eyes.

2. Unconditional love. No one else can give our children unconditional love. From an early age, children learn that the world appreciates them for what they do. But only we can love them for who they are, no matter what happens. We loved them even before they were born. We love them today. And we will always love them. We need to tell them this. It is something they can’t hear or feel enough.

3. Safety. Make your home into a source of comfort and security for your child. A place where he can expect warmth and peace and kindness. Create structure and a set of rules that give your child the sense that the walls in your house aren’t flimsy. That no one can push them down. Create these walls with your spouse. A healthy, loving marriage, enduring values, meaningful rituals and routines that your children can count on.

4. Wisdom. Give your child the opportunity to learn [from the] Torah, [The Bible, Parents, School, Life.] Teach him the precious wisdom of our ancestors. Share with him the stories and the struggles that have formed our nation and our families. Help him build an internal foundation of knowledge that he can rely upon as he grows.

5. Optimism. Model a positive attitude for your child by looking for the good in every situation. Show him how to focus on hope instead of despair. Teach him that we fall so that we have the opportunity to get up again. Help him transform failures into chances to grow.

6. Health. Teach your child to eat nutritious foods, to sleep well and to exercise. Instill within him a healthy respect for his body and for the gift of each of our five senses. Imbue within him a sense of responsibility for caring for and protecting his body so that he can use it to accomplish his other goals in life.

7. Support. Be a source of encouragement and support for your child. Be the one that he can talk to at the end of a hard day without worrying about judgment and criticism. Help him develop his interests. Nurture his talents. Be there to cheer him on and to renew his courage.

8. Curiosity. Teach your child to be curious about the world. Encourage him to ask questions about anything and everything. Ignite within him a passion for searching and learning. Help him to think with an open mind and with a perspective full of wonder.

9. Grit. Show your child how to persevere when things are hard. Teach him to [get back up when they fall down.] Encourage him to get up no matter how many times he fails. Reward him when he toils at a task that is difficult for him. Give him strategies to build his own resilience.

10. Competence. Give your child the tools to function independently in life. Teach him how to plan, how to acquire skills and how to take action. Teach him the value of building competence in a range of different areas but emphasize the areas where he is strongest.

MY THOUGHTS

But the REAL PERFECT GIFT  is Jesus.  Our Heavenly Father gave the one gift that he knew mankind needed to be reconciled to Him.

Jesus was born in a manger, lived a perfect life, was crucified, died on Calvary, and then rose on the third day and now sits at the right hand of God.

We are living in the end times and these are perilous times.  The weather is crazy, the animals are running as they sense something is about to happen.  Birds migrating to the wrong places, fishes dying by the millions.  Man is at war with each other and nations are perplexed and the seas are roaring.

I invite you not to worry about these things, but to give your life to Jesus Christ, he is our Savior, Redeemer, he is the King of kings and the Lord of lords.

Accept His gift today!

PRAY THIS PRAYER

Dear God in heaven, I come to you in the name of Jesus.  I acknowledge to you that I am a sinner, and I am sorry for my sins and the life that I have lived; I need your forgiveness.

I believe that your only begotten Son Jesus Christ shed His precious blood on the cross at Calvary and died for my sins, and I am now willing to turn from my sin.

You said in Your Holy Word, Romans 10:9 that if we confess the Lord our God and believe in our hearts that God raised Jesus from the dead, we shall be saved.

Right now I confess Jesus as the Lord of my soul.  With my heart, I believe that God raised Jesus from the dead.  This very moment I accept Jesus Christ as my own personal Savior and according to His Word, right now I am saved.

Thank you Jesus for your unlimited grace which has saved me from my sins.  I thank you Jesus that your grace never leads to license, but rather it always leads to repentance.  Therefore Lord Jesus transform my life so that I may bring glory and honor to you alone and not to myself.

Thank you Jesus for dying for me and giving me eternal life.

Amen.

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Gift lists by Sara Debbie Gutfreund

tags:  Bible, Christmas, Gifts, Wife, Husband, Mankind, God, Jesus, Savior, Redeemer